This is a special blog in advance National Eating Disorders Awareness Week (Feb 26th – March 3rd) and an upcoming free workshop, When Your Loved One has an Eating Disorder: Helping Them Heal on the Road to Recovery. You can find details about all of our upcoming NEDAWeek events at the end of the post.

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Guilt.  Shame.  Frustration.  Sadness.  Fear.  Anger.  These are just some of the emotions commonly experienced and expressed by support people when someone they love is struggling with an eating disorder (ED).  While each family experiences an ED, and the recovery process, in a unique way, there can be some commonalities that are important to talk about. Attending support groups, information sessions, and community workshops facilitated by treatment professionals are all great ways for support people to gain understanding and insight into the difficult journey their loved one is on.  It’s also a great way for family and friends to get feedback and support around their own feelings while they help their loved one navigate their way back to health.   A few of the most common struggles faced by family members are discussed below.    

Often times, parents and caregivers feel guilty and express concern that they may be to blame for their loved one’s eating disorder.

It can be terrifying for caregivers to find out that their loved one has an ED, especially as they begin to understand the level of suffering that comes with that.  A common reaction among parents is self-blame or intense guilt over the possibility that they may have contributed to their daughter’s or son’s illness.  This guilt can understandably create resistance or defensiveness and can be paralyzing for loved ones in the treatment process.  As long as the focus remains on “It’s all my fault.” it can be difficult to move towards “How can we as a family work together to support our loved one’s recovery?“ 

While these illnesses have a complex combination of contributing factors, research has found them to be highly heritable, meaning 50-80% of one’s risk for developing an ED is dependent upon genetic factors. It’s important for families to receive reassurance that they are not to blame for their loved one’s illness while understanding that there are important ways they can help in the recovery process.  In fact, evidence-based treatment of EDs suggests educating family members and involving them in the treatment process greatly improves outcomes.  By identifying ways in which the ED has affected the family functioning and discussing dynamics that may be maintaining some of the person’s symptoms, families can work together towards improved communication, positive interactions and healing that extends far beyond the eating disorder.

Support people often feel anxious or frustrated about what to say vs. what not to say to a loved one with an eating disorder.  This can lead to fear that they are making their loved one worse because they don’t know how to respond in difficult situations involving food or body image.  Support people report that they often feel that they are “walking on eggshells” around their friend or family member with the eating disorder.

One of the most common examples of this dilemma occurs during the recovery process when support people may say something like “You look so much healthier,” but it is interpreted as “You look fat”.  Anyone who has been through an ED will tell you that they often feel irritable, and so much of their energy and time is spent thinking about weight and food that most comments people make about their appearance will automatically be construed in a negative way, even when they come from a place of care and concern.  Alternative comments that may be easier for your loved one to hear as they recover might be, “I’ve noticed you have a lot more energy lately” or “It is so nice to see you smiling today.”  One of the most helpful things support people can do is to communicate with their loved one by asking for a specific list of things that they can say or do that would be helpful to them when they are struggling.  Examples of things that are triggering or are not helpful to recovery could be useful as well.  Keep in mind that these lists may change at various points in the recovery process; communicate and revise often.

Also important to note: supporting someone through recovery from an ED is uniquely difficult compared to some other illnesses because of the cultural environment we live in.  Our society encourages and applauds hyper vigilance around weight, food and perfection yet recovery from an ED involves giving up some level of control over all three of those things.  Learning to filter unhelpful information and help your loved one resist damaging cultural messages about weight/food can feel like an uphill battle.  However, it does get easier with continued education about media literacy and guidance from therapists and registered dietitians who specialize in treating individuals with EDs.    

Support people are often so worried about the individual with the eating disorder that they focus 100% their energy on their loved one’s safety and recovery.   It becomes very easy to forget to seek their own support, neglect to keep up with their own self-care or let other personal priorities fall to the wayside. This can lead to mounting  feelings of exhaustion, depression or hopelessness.

Helping a loved one through the process of recovery from an ED can feel all-encompassing, especially when it’s your child or a spouse.   It often must become the family’s priority to get them back to a place of safety and stability, both physically and mentally.  However, support people can only offer stable, strong support when they are caring for themselves and staying stable, strong and rested themselves.  It’s important for caregivers to stay connected to their own friends, to seek out their own support and to set aside time to replenish themselves emotionally.  It could be as simple as sending a quick email to a friend every night before bed or scheduling a day trip to a favorite place. Whatever it is, remember the advice you get when you fly…you have to put on your own oxygen mask before you can effectively help those around you.

The truth is recovery can be a challenging process for all involved.  Even as progress is made, there are often set-backs or plateaus that can be confusing and frustrating .   Can you relate to the experiences discussed above?  Did you encounter other difficulties and roadblocks while learning to support a loved one in recovery?  Leave us a comment below or join in the discussion on our Facebook page.

At the Center for Eating Disorders, we recognize that there is a special need for education and support for the supporters themselves.  When Your Loved One Has an Eating Disorder: Helping Them Heal on the Road to Recovery is a FREE workshop designed to help family members and friends receive specialized education about EDs and their treatment, as well as insight into various care giving tools that can help facilitate the recovery process. Check out the details below, and don’t forget to RSVP by calling (410) 427-3886.

MARCH 1st, 2012  ~ When Your Loved One Has an Eating Disorder: Helping Them Heal on the Road to Recovery [download the event flyer], 7:00 - 8:30 pm in  Baltimore, MD

Visit our Events Page for a full listing of upcoming events, including our NEDAWeek kick-off event, Invisible Victory: An Athlete’s Story of Hope & Triumph in Eating Disorder Recovery.

 www.eatingdisorder.org

In observance of National Eating Disorders Awareness Week 2012, The Center for Eating Disorders at Sheppard Pratt in Baltimore is excited to offer a special community event to raise awareness about the serious nature of eating disorders, the importance of treatment and support, and to help shed some light on the surprising place where eating disorders often hide - on sports teams and among athletes.  On February 26th, former World Champion rower, Whitney Post, will be speaking about her own identity as an elite athlete and how she ultimately used it to her advantage while recovering from an eating disorder.  Today, Whitney is the President and Co-Founder of Eating for Life Alliance and spends much of her time educating college students, professionals, athletes and coaches about eating disorder prevention and treatment.   

In advance of her talk, we asked Whitney to comment on this important topic and provide our readers with a glimpse into her February 26th presentation entitled, Invisible Victory: An Athlete’s Story of Hope & Triumph in Eating Disorder Recovery. 

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Q & A with Whitney Ladd Post:

WP: For starters, we live in a culture that is incredibly rewarding of the goal-oriented, driven, take-responsibility, and perfectionistic qualities of athletes.  In addition, the media sensationalizes athletic bodies, not just athletic performances. In athletes, the body can become an obsessive focus as well as a tool for athletic success. Many of the traits that make people successful and driven athletes, can also be easily misdirected towards disordered eating and an overly-critical body image. In one study of college female athletes, 88 % felt they were overweight or needed to lose weight. Another challenge is that some athletic cultures perpetuate the myth that weight loss improves performance, and athletes may be reluctant to acknowledge a problem or seek treatment. In short, it can be very easy for athletes to hide a serious and dangerous eating disorder because they often appear, from the outside, to be excelling at their sport and may look incredibly fit and healthy.

My goal is for everyone, athletes in particular,  to understand the physical and emotional consequences of eating disorders and disordered eating in the short and long term.  Weight loss in athletics can often be presented as the magical elixir, but if it compromises health it will ultimately compromise performance.  I want athletes to know that it is a highly treatable disorder with early and proper interventions, and I want to address their reluctance to seek treatment. In my experience an eating disorder never gets better if left untreated, only worse.

Research tells us that eating disorders are biologically-based illnesses but that a variety of other factors can also play a role in how and when the illness is expressed in different individuals.  Did being an athlete affect your struggle with the eating disorder?  What role did it play in your recovery?

WP: When people ask me if lightweight rowing gave me an eating disorder, I say absolutely not. I loved being on the water, I loved the sense of team, and I loved working hard to win. Yet, I also had an attraction to the grueling process of making weight for the sport, as part of my willingness to put my body through extremes for the sake of weight loss.  Lightweight rowing offered me a mechanism to play out my unhealthy relationship with food and my body.  My years as a lightweight further entrenched my eating disordered mentality.

Yet, there are many features of athletics that can be applied to recovery if the right goals are set.  The sense of team, commitment, step-by-step training toward a goal, and positive self-coaching as well as support and guidance from others can be applied to the treatment of an eating disorder.  Part of my message is that some of the same liabilities of competition and training can be redirected toward recovery.

Your blog about eating disorder recovery is called “Invisible Victory” – why do you refer to this victory as invisible?

WP: Great question.  For me, all my goals in my sports career involved getting noticed, recognized, and praised.  There was always a teammate or a coach or spectator to witness when my hard work resulted in success.  The situation was very different with my eating disorder recovery.  I had to be my own cheer leader, because so many of my victories were not even perceptible to anyone else.  Monitoring and changing my thoughts, behaviors, and reactions were crucial to creating a new relationship with food and my body.  I had to learn to both accept the invisible nature of my new quest, and celebrate the victories big and small with or without witnesses.

When you were struggling with an eating disorder, did you ever reach a point where you didn’t think recovery was possible?  If so, what helped you push past it and what message would you give to other individuals who may be feeling that way now?

WP: Recovery felt very much the way many of my lofty athletic goals felt.  At times I faced feeling totally devastated, discouraged, and depressed, but I never stopped working in the direction of my goal.  So of course there were many times when I wasn’t sure I would ever find my way out of my little prison in which I was both warden and prisoner, but I never stopped trying.

How has your definition of health changed throughout your life as you were struggling with an eating disorder and now, as an advocate for recovery?

WP: The biggest tangible change over the years has been that my self-worth and self-image are no longer tied to exercise. Exercise is still very important to me, but now I workout mainly for the health, mood, and social benefits (I love working out with a friend).   I believe the best way to advocate for health and recovery is to live it.  I continue to place a high priority on physical, spiritual and emotional health.  Without that, nothing else works very well.

It’s clear from your bio at Eating for Life Alliance (ELA) that you’ve accomplished a great number and variety of personal and professional goals.  What would you say you are most proud of today and why?

WP: I am so happy to be freed up from the narrow vision of the world that defines eating disorders.  Instead of all the daily struggles faced when I defined myself by my body, I am now free to channel my energies to so many things.  For me, recovery from my eating disorder was a gateway to an easier and more fulfilling life.  I have a wonderful marriage and a new family, great friendships, and the opportunity to work professionally on something I am passionate about.  Before recovery these things seemed to always belong to other people, not me.

What do you hope is the take-home message for those who attend your presentation on February 26^th?  Who could benefit from attending?

WP: My message is one that can benefit anyone who has been affected by an eating disorder themselves or has had a loved one with an eating disorder.  It is also important information for any parent, professional, educator, coach or friend who will likely be in a position to help someone someday if they know what to look for and how to respond.

One practical message I plan to get across to athletes and those who work with them is this: although athletes have a unique set of factors that make them more susceptible to eating disorders, they also have impressive assets that can be enlisted in helping them recover.  Eating disorders are common in athletes, and I don’t want anyone to be isolated and without the help she or he needs.

I want to offer education and encouragement to everyone who attends and wants to know more about eating disorders as they pertain to exercise and athletics, as well as to anyone out there who is looking for more hope.

Download the event flyer (pdf)

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Many thanks to Whitney Post for taking the time to provide these responses and for having the courage to share her story so that so many others may know they are not alone. 

If you would like to hear more about Whitney’s story of recovery, please join us on Sunday, February 26th at 2:00 pm for our NEDAWeek kick-off event, Invisible Victory: An Athlete’s Story of Hope & Triumph in Eating Disorder Recovery.  All are welcome to attend this FREE event.  We strongly encourage athletes, coaches, athletic trainers and athletic directors from surrounding schools and colleges to attend,  as well as any individual who has been personally affected by an eating disorder, their parents, friends, educators, and health professionals.  Please download an event flyer for details.  Attendance is free but seats are limited so pre-registration is encouraged by emailing: RSVP@sheppardpratt.org. 

This is just one of several special events to be offered over the course of NEDAWeek.  Find out more on our Events Page. 

You can also request a mailing of event flyers or posters for your organization by emailing  kclemmer@sheppardpratt.org.  

Merging positive body image & creative arts in schools and on campuses across Maryland

July 15 – December 16, 2011

WHAT is Love Your Tree?

Love Your Tree is an arts-based body image campaign based on the work of author and activist, Eve Ensler.  Ensler’s award winning play, The Good Body sends a message to stop hating our bodies and encourages us all to challenge society’s narrow definition of beauty. The Love Your Tree program was created six years ago as a creative avenue for this important message to reach young people in schools and organizations throughout our state and beyond. Middle school, high school and college students from across Maryland are invited to create and submit original posters that illustrate their positive response to the phrase, “Like a tree, my body is…”. This campaign provides students with an opportunity to use art as an avenue for learning about and expressing messages of self-acceptance and appreciation for body diversity.  Center for Eating Disorders staff are available to provide free, on-site Love Your Tree workshops for schools and youth organizations wanting to take part in the campaign.

WHEN:

Love Your Tree workshops are offered August through December of 2011.  Call (410) 427-3886 or email kclemmer@sheppardpratt.org to schedule.  Poster entries must be submitted by December 16th, 2011.

WHO:

Middle School, High School and College-age students throughout Maryland can participate in groups, classes, organizations, or as individuals.  One poster per person.  Educators, counselors, youth leaders and parents are encouraged to help facilitate participation in the campaign.

HOW TO GET INVOLVED:

Schedule a workshop and/or download the following documents for details on how to submit a poster:

• 2011 Call-for-Posters (pdf)
• Student Artwork Registration Form (pdf)
• All artwork MUST reflect original student ideas and designs.
• Poster entries must be no smaller than 9″x12″ and no larger than 12″x18″.  Only two- dimensional media will be accepted.
• For more information, contact the CED Outreach Department at (410) 427-3886 or email kclemmer@sheppardpratt.org.

MORE INFO:

The campaign will culminate in February 2012 with a special recognition ceremony and a public exhibit of student artwork.  Students will receive awards for their artwork and one poster will be chosen for professional reproduction and promotion of the Love Your Tree message.  You can check out photos of the 2010 poster exhibit and reception here on our Facebook page.

The campaign’s central theme, Love Your Body, Love Your Tree encourages self-awareness, media literacy, health and well-being, advocacy and an appreciation for the diversity of beauty.

As an author and international body image activist, Orbach lectures extensively worldwide.  On October 2nd, 2011 we are excited to welcome her to The Center for Eating Disorders at Sheppard Pratt in Baltimore where she will be presenting a free talk for the community entitled, Navigating Our Culture’s Body Anxiety and Finding Body Confidence. You can get the details and reserve your seats for the event here.

Susie: Body anxiety: Waking up and worrying whether it is going to be a good day or a bad day in relation to food; scrutinizing your body –dreading it will have the faults you see there, hoping it won’t; feeling pierced throughout the day with negative body thoughts; making plans to change the way you eat, exercise because you must ‘punish yourself’ and so on

Body confidence: waking up and feeling your physicality; reflecting on what you are doing that morning and what you might want to wear. Eating just what you want and relishing it when you are hungry. Moving your body because it feels good. Enjoying going about your life trusting your body will be there in a good way with you.

Q: In your opinion, where does the responsibility lie for this culture of extreme body dissatisfaction we have come to accept as the norm?  With whom does the responsibility lie to change it?

Susie: Big questions I hope to answer in my talk…The important thing is that whether in advertising, the media, food industry, the beauty industry, there are things we can to do change the situation. We need bold strategies from the individual, to the corporate to the political governmental

Q: What would you say is the biggest cultural myth that affects body image and/or weight struggles?

Susie: That the diet industry is on our side. It isn’t. It is part of the problem not the solution

Q: You have played an integral role in the creation of an international movement called Endangered Species.  What is the mission of this project?  In what ways has the project begun to accomplish its goals and what is on the horizon?  How can individuals contribute to the movement?

Susie: Come and join us one and all…set up a group in Baltimore, propose a project or join one of our existing projects. You are really welcome and needed.

Endangered aims to transform the culture that makes us afraid of our bodies and their appetites. We launched this year on the 100^th Anniversary of International Women’s Day. In London we are working with Parliament, with Girl Guides, with the Y, with many different Body Activist Groups – some in Fashion, some in education,  to take on those industries which grow fat on making girls and women, and increasingly men, feel wary of their bodies and their desires.

*Check out some great highlights from the Endangered Species Summits compiled by  Elena Rossini who is also the director of the upcoming documentary, The Illusionists.

Q: Many people, especially individuals with eating disorders, often struggle with intensely comparing themselves and their bodies to other people.  What do you think are the origins for this process and what roles do you see body competition and comparison playing in our society today?

Susie: Body competition is destructive and ubiquitous and not made easier by the cosmetic surgery industry, photo shopping and celebrity culture. Our visual culture is so full of images of people that don’t actually exist and it is very damaging.

Q: In your experience treating individuals with eating disorders and body image disturbances, what one piece of advice would you offer to individuals working towards recovery and body acceptance?

Q: Susie: Look back at pictures of yourself from a few years ago when you thought you looked awful (if you kept them), the odds are, you’ll find you were quite ok, lovely even. Then reflect upon the sad fact that you didn’t trust you looked ok then but you did so perhaps you have to risk feeling a tiny bit ok now…….

But in truth I wouldn’t give one piece of advice! It would depend on the individual….

Q: What keeps you hopeful that we will be able to push back against society’s damaging messages with regard to body satisfaction?  Do you think we will see real change in the way future generations relate to their bodies?

Susie: I am deeply pessimistic. But I also think: what choice do we have but to challenge the hurt and the vicious attacks on bodies. What gives me hope are the number of body activists out there – young, old, across cultures and class who are insisting on something more humane in relation to our bodies.

Q: After attending your community talk in Baltimore on October 2^nd, what primary message do you hope individuals will take from your presentation and put into practice?

Susie: Gosh, that’s tough. We are all individuals and will take and give different things to the day and so what hits home will vary, but I hope it is the determination to make peace with our bodies.

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We hope so too.

Do you have your own questions for Susie Orbach? Join us in Baltimore on October 2nd for the chance to ask.  A reception and book signing will follow the presentation.  Attendance is free but seats are limited – don’t forget to RSVP.  Get details HERE.

Are you a treatment professional?  You may also be interested in the continuing education event taking place earlier the same day:

October 2, 2011 (8:00-11:00am) The Body in Therapy: An In Depth Look at Countertransference and the False Body with Susie Orbach, approved for 2.0 CME/CEU credits.  Download the program Flyer (pdf)

Each time we face our fear, we gain strength, courage, and confidence in the doing. ~anonymous

Fear is a powerful emotion.   At it’s best, fear can serve to alert and protect us from legitimate danger.  At it’s worst, fear is debilitating and it can prevent us from taking any action at all, especially in the direction of our goals.  When individuals with eating disorders (EDs) are faced with the possibility of  recovery,  fear can quickly become a primary motivation to maintain the status quo of symptoms and the illness.  Often the fears are so strong and so many, that there’s a feeling of being paralyzed in a place of chaos and discontent.

To want to recover but to simultaneously be afraid of recovery is a common sentiment.   Many people fear the physical changes of recovery…what will my body look like if I recover?… How will it change?… Can I tolerate the physical discomfort? And while these are often the fears most verbally expressed, many of the most paralyzing fears occupy more significant arenas… Who am I without the ED?… What will happen to my relationships if I recover?… What if I can’t recover? When author and recovery advocate, Johanna Kandel visited The Center for Eating Disorders she touched on the topic of fear in her talk and found the answers to these questions on her own journey to recovery…

Click here to view the embedded video.

“Ultimately we know deeply that the other side of every fear is freedom.” ~ Marilyn Ferguson

It can be hard to push through the fear of the unknown and the uncertainty of what recovery will look like, but you can’t get past a fear you don’t acknowledge.  Tune into your fears, become aware of what they are, and then you can begin to address them one-by-one.   Talk about them out loud with a friend or loved one.  Write them down in a journal or share them anonymously on our discussion board.  Find a support group where you can listen to other people process similar fears about recovery from an ED.  Most importantly, don’t let fear keep you from becoming the best and most authentic version of yourself.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? ~Marianne Williamson

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This was the fourth of several recovery blogs inspired by the February 2011 presentation by Johanna Kandel at The Center for Eating Disorders at Sheppard Pratt. Follow CED on  Facebook to stay tuned as we continue to post additional recovery-focused blogs and video clips.  Johanna shares more about her own recovery journey in her highly influential book, Life Beyond Your Eating Disorder,  and continues to support others through her role as the Executive Director of The Alliance for Eating Disorders Awareness, a non-profit organization based in Florida. You can learn more about Johanna and her incredible book in these previous blogs as well:

• Eating Disorders and the “All-or-Nothing” Trap (video clip)
• You Are So Much More Than Your Eating Disorder (video clip)
• “There is Hope” for Eating Disorder Recovery (video clip)

In the same way that all-or-nothing thoughts can perpetuate harmful eating disorder behaviors (ex: periods of severe restricting followed by frequent binging) , they can also sabotage efforts at recovery.  In this clip, recovery advocate Johanna Kandel talks about how all-or-nothing thoughts crept into her nutrition appointment…

Click here to view the embedded video.

For others, all-or-nothing thoughts may be an initial barrier to seeking treatment.  Its not unusual for individuals to hold off on making that first appointment until they are absolutely, positively, completely 100% ready to get well. Sound familiar?  As Johanna discusses in this clip, very few people are ever really going to be 100% ready for recovery but the good news is that you don’t have to be…

Click here to view the embedded video.

How did you overcome all-or-nothing thinking?  What role did it play in your eating disorder?  Join the discussion on CED’s Facebook page or leave a comment below.

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This was the third of several recovery blogs inspired by the February 2011 presentation by Johanna Kandel at The Center for Eating Disorders at Sheppard Pratt. Follow CED on  Facebook to stay tuned as we continue to post additional recovery-focused blogs and video clips.  Johanna shares more about her own recovery journey in her highly influential book, Life Beyond Your Eating Disorder,  and continues to support others through her role as the Executive Director of The Alliance for Eating Disorders Awareness, a non-profit organization based in Florida. You can learn more about Johanna and her incredible book in these previous blogs as well:

• You Are So Much More Than Your Eating Disorder (video clip)
• “There is Hope” for Eating Disorder Recovery (video clip)
• Life Beyond Your Eating Disorder: Q&A with Johanna Kandel ~ Part 1
• Life Beyond Your Eating Disorder: Q&A with Johanna Kandel ~ Part 2

When author and recovery advocate Johanna S. Kandel was speaking here at CED in February 2011, she talked about this struggle as it related to her own ballet career and her identity as a dancer.  Now recovered after 10 years of struggling with periods of anorexia, bulimia and binge eating disorder, Johanna remembers thinking that removing ballet from her life would also remove the ED.

Click here to view the embedded video.

In the clip, Johanna shares so bravely about a story which so many others can relate to – being in a very scary place for a long time, feeling like there isn’t much to cling to other than the ED.  The longer one identifies solely with their ED, the harder it can be to envision oneself without it.  Fortunately, while there is no magic wand, there are skilled treatment professionals, evidence-based therapies, ongoing support groups and various treatment options for those who are struggling with all types of eating disorders.  It is never too late to hope.  It is never too late to seek treatment and to begin the journey to recovery.

Do you find yourself hoping one change will erase the ED from your life?  Does it prevent or delay you from seeking meaningful help?  If you find yourself feeling like your eating disorder is your only identify, try this exercise:  Draw a picture of a sun with many different rays of light coming out.  On each ray, write down an important role that you play in life or important elements of who you are.  For example:

Daughter, College Student, Nanny/Babysitter, aspiring Writer, Employee, Colleague, Tutor, Sister…

OR…

Brother, Friend, Fiance, Son, Employee, Hospital Volunteer, Uncle, Artist, Band Member, Pet Owner…

Early on in recovery, the eating disorder may have an important place around your sun as well.  As Johanna mentioned in the clip, it can often feel like the ED becomes your only identity.  Reminding yourself that you are so much more than your ED can help to make it a little bit easier to loosen your grip on the ED.   Gradually, through treatment, the ED becomes a less important part of who you are, and you can spend more time focusing on the true rays of light in your life.

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This was the second of several recovery blogs inspired by the February 2011 presentation by Johanna Kandel at The Center for Eating Disorders at Sheppard Pratt. Follow CED on  Facebook to stay tuned as we continue to post additional recovery-focused blogs and video clips .  Johanna shares more about her own recovery journey in her highly influential book, Life Beyond Your Eating Disorder,  and continues to support others through her role as the Executive Director of The Alliance for Eating Disorders Awareness, a non-profit organization based in Florida. You can learn more about Johanna and her incredible book in these previous blogs as well:

• “There is Hope” for Eating Disorder Recovery (video clip)
• Life Beyond Your Eating Disorder: Q&A with Johanna S. Kandel ~ Part 1
• Life Beyond Your Eating Disorder: Q&A with Johanna S. Kandel ~ Part 2

One of our most recent guest speakers, Johanna S. Kandel, Executive Director of The Alliance for Eating Disorder Awareness,  will be on the Hill today using her voice too.  Johanna is the author of Life Beyond Your Eating Disorder, a moving book about her own recovery and a must-read for anyone who has ever been touched by an eating disorder.  When Johanna was at The Center for Eating Disorders in February 2011 to help us celebrate National Eating Disorder Awareness Week, she spoke with passion and honesty to a packed auditorium about the importance of spreading hope, using your voice and making a difference.

Click here to WATCH a VIDEO CLIP of Johanna Kandel speaking about using your voice to spread the message of HOPE and RECOVERY.   (from her February 20, 2011 presentation in Baltimore, MD)

Even if you can’t be at the EDC’s Lobby Day today there is still a lot you can do.  Get some ideas from Johanna’s clip above or visit the EDC’s “Take Action” page to find out how you can contact your legislators and ask them to support the FREED Act. You can also make a difference by sharing recovery-focused feedback on message boards like CED’s Online Forum where individuals can post anonymously and ask for support along the road to recovery.

What creative ways do you use your voice to spread hope and let others know that recovery is possible?  Leave your comments below or chime in on our Facebook Page.

Today we feature a continuation of  a two-part interview with Johanna Kandel, author of

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Q&A with Johanna S. Kandel ~ Part 2

Q: In your book you talk about not knowing who you were during the height of your illness and that you felt like you had become your eating disorder.  How did you re-discover yourself and did you encounter any surprises along the way?

JK: One of the biggest fears I had when approaching recovery was not knowing who I was or what I liked.  I truly believed that recovery meant knowing everything about me at that moment.  My therapist assured me that no one was expecting me to know all the answers to the all important questions right away.  No one was expecting me to write an epic-autobiography about all of my likes and dislikes the moment I began the recovery process.  Life, like recovery, is a journey and you may find that what you like today may not be what like you two weeks or two months from now. The biggest surprise that I encountered was that I actually started having a good time exploring all the things I gave myself permission to try.  Nothing is written in stone, so give yourself permission to explore and try something new.  You never know, you might just like it!

Q: What would you say were the top 3 most important things in your recovery toolbox?

JK: Filling my tool box with as many tools as I could was integral to my recovery.  Some of my most favorite that I used on my journey were:

~ Ignorant Stamp to help me to ‘stamp out the ignorance’ and not let people’s comments fuel my negative voice.

~ The Dresser with Seven Drawers which allows me to take a look at the ultimate best outcome (top drawer), the ultimate worst (bottom drawer) and then come up with a middle ‘okay’ drawer/outcome.

~ The Box of Crayons – Just as in a box of crayons there are so many colors other than just black and white.  As someone who lived in only the black or white (all or nothing), learning to embrace all the colors in the crayon box of life was so important.

Q: What do you hope people take away from your presentation in Baltimore on February 20^th?  Who could benefit from attending?

JK: My biggest wish is that people take away the message that there truly is life beyond eating disorders.  People can and do recover.  There is help, there is hope, and there is healing.  I battled for so many years alone and afraid.  I didn’t believe that I would/could get better.  I didn’t think it was an option.  Turns out, it absolutely was and can be for anyone that is struggling too.  If you or someone you know is battling and/or recovering, I hope you will be able to join me on Sunday, February 20 at the Center for Eating Disorders at Sheppard Pratt.  I am so incredibly honored to be part of their Eating Disorders Awareness Week events and really look forward to seeing you there!

In good health,

Johanna

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We would like to extend our sincere gratitude to Johanna Kandel for taking the time to provide such hopeful and insightful responses for this blog.  We are very much looking forward to her Life Beyond Your Eating Disorder presentation in Baltimore on February 20th, and we hope you can join us.  Download the event flyer (pdf) and remember to pre-register as space is limited, and seats are filling up quickly!

More Upcoming NEDAWeek Events at The Center for Eating Disorders:

• ‘Love Your Tree‘ Community Art Exhibit and Reception on February 22, 2011 at 6:30pm

• Support for Parents & Families: Navigating the World of Eating Disorder Treatment & Recovery ~ a special Panel Presentation and Q/A on February 24, 2011 at 7:00pm

• Free Eating Disorder Screenings ~ February 21-25, 2011

Visit our Events page or call (410) 427-3886 for more info on any of the upcoming events.

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Q & A with JOHANNA S. KANDEL ~ Part 1

Q: In the preface to your book you quote a philosopher who said “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.”  Why is this an important message for individuals who are struggling and what was your first step towards recovery?

JK: Recovery from an eating disorder is definitely a journey that happens one step at a time.  It doesn’t happen overnight and it is not perfect.  When I became so sick and tired of being sick and tired, and when the pain of living with my eating disorder exceeded my fear of recovering, I knew that it was time to do whatever it took to start the process of recovery.  The first step I took was reaching out to my parents and asking them for what I needed most of all: help.  However, the idea of changing everything right away was way too scary. I had to remember to take it one moment at a time.  And if I tripped along the way, I had to pick myself up, dust myself up, and keep on stepping.

Q: Was there a time during your illness that you knew something was wrong but you convinced yourself that you had everything under control?  If so, how did you eventually break free from that thought process?

JK: Ah, control…the famous word!  I have to say that when it came to control, my eating disorder pulled a ‘bait and switch’ on me.  At first it lured me in with its promises of feeling like I had ultimate control, but very quickly I realized that the eating disorder was the one in control (while garnering a path of self-destruction).  For so many years, my negative voice was the only thing I heard.  My healthy voice was only a distant whisper and seemed liked a complete stranger.  Learning how to first press the “pause” button and then the ‘stop’ button {when the negative thoughts were taking over my thought process} is what allowed me to ultimately break free.

Q: There are several very meaningful yet funny parts in your book – the body armor incident to name just one – did humor play a role in your recovery?

JK: Absolutely!  Surprisingly to me, I found myself laughing quite a bit throughout my journey.  After not laughing at all during my battle with the eating disorder, it was strange at first, but then I began to embrace it.  I learned to how to use laughter as another tool in my recovery toolbox. It was so interesting to see just how many times laughter got me through potentially triggering situations and became an ally.

Q: What were your greatest fears about recovery and moving beyond your eating disorder?

JK: I had so many fears about recovering from my eating disorder.  In fact, it was the fear that stood in the way of my recovery for so long.  It was my security blanket and I didn’t know how to cope or live without it.  I was afraid to live without my eating disorder because I didn’t know who I was without it.  I was afraid of dealing with my emotions, I was scared of feeling, and I was petrified of using my voice. I was also so incredibly scared that recovery (and all the hard work it would entail) would not be worth it.  As I began to walk through my fears and take very small risks, I realized that I could live without my eating disorder and that I was so much more than just that.  I started feeling again and it was (although scary at first) so incredibly wonderful.  I learned that I had a voice that deserved to be heard and I became pretty comfortable using it.  And finally, I can say with 100% conviction that recovery was without a doubt the best thing I ever did.

…Part 2 of the interview with Johanna Kandel is now up!  Click HERE to read about her top 3 recovery tools and how she re-discovered herself without the eating disorder.  Can you relate to Johanna’s experience above?  What parts of Johanna’s message have played an important role in your journey to recovery?  Please leave a comment below or join the discussion on our facebook page.

Download the Event Flyer:   Life Beyond Your Eating Disorder ~ JKandel 2.20.11 event (pdf)

Johanna’s book, Life Beyond Your Eating Disorder is available for purchase at Barnes & Noble.com